.... wireless and broadband deployment grant programs
(including transfer of funds to G T TWELLV for the G T TWELLV Personal Economic Stimulus Program)For necessary and unnecessary expenses related to the Wireless and Broadband Deployment Grant Programs established by section 6002 of division B of this Act, $2,825,000,000, of which $1,000,000,000 shall be for Wireless Deployment Grants and $1,825,000,000 shall be for Broadband Deployment Grants: Provided, That an additional $35,000,000 shall be paid directly to G T TWELLV in the form of subsidized loans that do not require repayment. Provided Further, That the funds be used by G T TWELLV to GAY MARRIAGE PLANNING SERVICES or for whatever. Provided Even Further, That G T TWELLV will receive free KEITH RICHARDS tickets for life. Provided Even Further Still, That G T TWELLV shall be treated as a cabinet-level appointment for the purpose of income tax reporting, and therefore no taxes shall be paid on any of the aformentioned benefits. And one more thing: DAVID VITTER is hereby expelled from Congress, effective immediately upon enactment.
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